by Amanda White

read by Nathan Beatty

Ssssh!

Do not rush now

I could be in another place but I am here

At first I am distracted by what I see

Then I make it what I am seeing

The reflected trees in the deep pool

I want to call beautiful

Now listening to the deliberate moving of water

To and fro

Timings

Contrivings

Waiting for something to happen

What I see is not what I know

What I know is not what I see

What I sense is not what I want

What I want is not what I have

What is real is already a memory

And what is gone is already returning

Leaves

Bones

Lives

Shadows

The stories we can tell of ourselves and others

So I come again

To the edges

Bringing me back to the place I have always known

Held down below the gentle, rippling surface

Hidden between the stabbing and persistent pulse of falling rain

Waiting to resurface

Secrets

Desires

Nothing

Nature shrugs us off

Take me to your quiet heart and still me now

For I cannot bear too much more

Let me float by

Within the calm of this reflected pool

And let me know

If only for the briefest of moments

That what I feel is what I am.